Bill Simmons Is A Twitter Genius

Bill Simmons, being the sports/life wiz that he is, has decided to take advantage of Celtics tweeters by creating a "Celtics Chants" twitter account.  The objective behind this idea is to get all fans on the same page with obnoxiously catchy chants.  Fans will be able to submit ideas by mentioning @CelticsChants in their tweets, and then the best will be chosen and retweeted by Simmons. With the explosion of twitter on mobile devices, fans will know exactly what to chant at what time.  It's pure genius.  I'm not sure if Simmons is the first to do this, but he damn sure if the right dude to take action, and for that he deserves at least a HJ from every Celtics dancer.  By the looks of it, fans are quickly jumping on board, compiling over 6,000 followers in a matter of days.  Now let's ream out 'Bron 'Bron and sink the Cavs ship yet again. Hey Lebron, how about...#Boo-kies-pissed-off

Follow @CelticsChants Here

Bingo, Bango, Bongo.

I gotta give it to Bango here, putting his life on the line to bring some energy to the Bucks arena. He could single handedly be the reason why the Bucks take down the Hawks in the first round.

Props to Jeff for the tip.

Daily Dumbass: Shaqueer

Cleveland Plain Dealer: Shaq only needs to play a complementary role for the #1 overall Cavaliers, which bodes well for his re-introduction to the rotation. Another good sign -- according to the Plain-Dealer, "[Shaq] lost around 20 pounds by running and cutting out cheeseburgers during his absence."

So this is what Shaq does when he's sidelined with a "thumb" injury huh? Seems to me like the Cav's have some bigger issues on their hands that Shaq's phalangees. Sure Shaq has participated in his fair share of antics over the course of his career, but c'mon Diesel, keep the wig off and your shirt on, you're starting to act like Starbury.

Who am I to judge though, we all know Shaq is in Cleveland for one reason and one reason only; to harness Dwight (assuming the possibility that somehow the Celtics lose). Maybe Shaq's antics are simply an attempt of intimidating Superman, who himself, has impersonated Rick James. I'd have to give Dwight the upper hand on this one. I mean at least he got paid a few milli from Vitamin Water. It appears Shaq did it out of pure boredom over his Ustream channel. Here's an idea Shaq, get back on those cheeseburgers and off the Super Freak streak.

You're kidding, Maria.

TMZ: Tennis babe Maria Sharapova and her Lakers boyfriend Sasha Vujacic like making things difficult for themselves. While in Palm Springs on Wednesday, the athletic couple played a bizarro game of tennis and used the racket's handle to hit the ball.

They're a perfect match.

How the fuck has this gone unnoticed? Did anyone know that the blonde bombshell, Maria Sharapova, is dating that douchebag Sasha Vujacic. You've got to be kidding me. Why why why why why would she ever date that pussy. Is there a more hated basketball player than Sasha Vujacic on the planet? I mean, he fucking sucks at the sport he plays, no one likes him, and all he does it bitch. I guess that's how you scoop a girl like Maria. All you've got to do is be a pussy. Chicks apparently dig that these days, especially hot ones.

Best part of this whole story is now we know why Sasha cut his hair. Not because he realized guys shouldn't have long hair like their female counterparts, but because Maria most likely told him too.

We also now have the answer why Sharapova can't play tennis anymore. Because she's with Sasha, what a joke.

Daily Dumbass: Guy Hits Face On Basketball Rim

This quite possibly could be one of the craziest/funniest things I have ever seen. I mean, how many times have you seen a guy jump off a trampoline and dunked and thought, "wow I wonder if anyone has ever hit their head on the rim."

Well there you go. What a dumb ass.

"14-30 n' Gettin Worse...Arenas & Crittenton Suspended for Season"

As if the Wiz weren't already lubed and tubed enough for the season, Arenas & Crittenton suspended by David Stern for remainder of season.

"The Washington Post first reported the length of the Arenas suspension, and a source with knowledge of the meeting told ESPN.com that Arenas told Stern that he expected and deserved to be suspended for the rest of the season. It was unclear whether Crittenton also would decline to file an appeal.

"The NBA has conducted a thorough investigation of events relating to this matter," Stern said. "It is not disputed that, following an argument on the team's flight home from a game in Phoenix, both Mr. Arenas and Mr. Crittenton brought guns to the Verizon Center locker room and -- with other players and team personnel present or nearby -- displayed them to one another in a continuation of their dispute. The players engaged in this conduct despite a specific rule set forth in the collective bargaining agreement between the NBA and the Players Association prohibiting players from possessing a weapon at an NBA facility, and reminders of this prohibition given annually by the NBA to players both in writing and in person."

Lesson kids...don't bring gats to BBALL practice